Sex. That mystical physical activity that can burn more than 85 calories in a mere 30 minutes. Some consider it sacred and choose to wait. Others are a little less discerning. Then there’re the ones who don’t go out searching to get laid, but don’t turn down a good opportunity because, let’s face it, sex is fun.
Here’s a typical night for many adolescent: Meet someone, sleep with that someone, probably never see that someone again. It’s casual sex. No strings attached. Hooking up. Whatever you want to call is, it’s sex minus the messy relationship.
A survey by TrèSugar and SELF Magazine released in May asked 2,000 single women ages 18 to 64 about their casual sex experiences. It found that 82 percent of them engaged in casual sex with one or more partners, so it’s a pretty normal thing for women to do.
So the next time you hear that women are reserved creatures with little or no sexual desire, remember these numbers. But also remember we are not whores.
Society may want us to be timid housewives, chained to the stove and begrudgingly procreating, but we can’t ignore our libido anymore. One sex partner for life is so old-fashioned.
I am an advocate of the whole sex without the labels deal. I’m too busy to maintain a healthy relationship, but coffee and sleepovers every once in a while sounds nice to me. However, sometimes the coffee doesn’t happen and the late-night meetings turn into booty calls – which is okay, too, if a woman or man wants to do that. I won’t think any less of her or him.
The survey shows that 63 percent of the women “felt good” after their last encounter, while 37 percent felt uncomfortable. Only 19 percent were regretful.
Now I’m not one for regretting things. A one-night stand is a fun way to relieve stress and can be a push-up bra for self-esteem, but that’s not always enough. Sometimes I want more; I want that coffee date, or time to hang out, so when a guy pretends that I don’t exist after an encounter, I get a little irked.
We slept together, it’s not like I want a ring on my finger. I think the fact that we got that intimate should make things less awkward or at least make it a little easier to talk, but it seems that things never quite work out that way. Does sex really have to make everything harder?
I thought our progressive society was moving towards a point where we don’t have to feel ashamed for succumbing to carnal desire. So all you Catholics out there, it’s time to get rid of that guilt and let loose. That goes for any other in-the-closet sex kittens, too. I respect that everyone has a personal choice to make about their bodies, but you should be doing what make you happy, not what society or your family expects because I bet in a few years, you’ll be wishing you’d have fun while you could.
Although sex with a fling apparently isn’t as satisfying for a woman as sex is with a partner. The survey found that 74 percent of women have a harder time climaxing during a casual encounter. In the SELF article, Marta Meana, Ph.D., professor of psychology at the University of Nevada, suggests that women don’t feel fully comfortable with the partner. I say women may focus more on getting the guy off than themselves.
The survey also found that more than half of women under 30 have had sex after drinking, which can also be a little inhibiting to say the least. Shakespeare said it best: “It provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance.”
In conclusion, casual sex is fun. After you lose your virginity, there isn’t much else to lose, so go at it. Safely. Don’t do it if you don’t think you can handle it emotionally. Never do it without protection. Just be smart about being slutty, kids, and we’ll all be okay.