If there’s anything gay men know well, it’s that in our pursuit for Mr. Right we become strangely familiar with Mr. Right Now. And much like our wardrobe, Mr. Right Now comes in an array of assortments and leaves us feeling bored with what we’ve chosen by the end of the day … or night.

Mr. Right Now has many faces. He could be one dinner date or five. He could be the guy you haven’t touched but flirt endlessly with through texting. He’s smart. He’s stupid. He might even be a shoulder to cry on. Regardless, he’s someone who enters your life for a day, a week or maybe even a month who holds your attention, challenges your views, rocks your sack, and then simply vanishes. Whether you tossed him to the curb (or visa versa) you can’t deny that Mr. Right Now makes an impact. And here’s the funny thing: a lot of us have one, two and maybe even three or more of these men at the same time! At least we’re keeping Applebee’s and Trojan in business.

But doesn’t the whole set up get exhausting?  Think about it; we’re letting new people come in and out of our lives just like we wear a different pair of socks each day—and our socks even get a second chance! I don’t know about you, but I’m so tired of repeating the same surface conversations and playing 20 questions until the both of us can’t think of anything else except to jump on each other.

I sometimes think a lot of us anymore aren’t good at being single. We rely too much on having a man by our side to fulfill all sorts of different needs, but we’re becoming too selfish to keep the guy around for more than an emotional or physical booty call.  I don’t know if it’s because we’re young guys who feel the need to “sow our wild oats,” but I’m concerned that the more we find Mr. Right Now, we could be ruining an opportunity with Mr. Right.

Remember the saying, “He’s not going to buy the cow if he’s getting the milk for free?” Though this is geared toward the gals, there’s a lot of truth behind it for the guys too! Sure you can argue that you own your sexuality and do what you please because it’s your prerogative … Britney has more of an influence than we think … but when it’s time to face the facts, the only one owning anything in this predicament is, you guessed it, Mr. Right Now.

You think you’re controlling every little facet, down to the finest detail, of your relationship with your MRN (assuming it’s longer than one night), but take a deeper look and you’ll find that not only does he hold your attention but he might control your thought processes, your attitude toward the whole idea of a relationship and better yet, how you spend your free time.

A one-night-stand is one thing, but a never-ending Mr. Right Now… well, you deserve it for yourself and your chronic cohabiter to stop the games. But remember (and please excuse me for the cliché) if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.

Special thanks to SeeMing Lee for the featured image.