The Trump administration reportedly banned the Centers for Disease Control from using the words, “transgender,” “evidence-based,” “science-based,” “diversity,” “vulnerable,” “entitlement” and “fetus” in documents for next year’s budget, according to The Washington Post.

The CDC is the federal agency which works on issues of public health. Several CDC projects focus on issues connected to these banned words, including HIV prevention for transgender people and, presumably, plenty of science- and evidence-based research.

President Trump and his supporters have frequently criticized “political correctness,” a term which often refers to treating minorities with respect, claiming that “political correctness” threatens freedom of speech rights.

Of course, there’s no better example of upholding the First Amendment than the White House creating lists of forbidden words.

As an editor, much of my job includes thinking of synonyms. Just now, I’ve rewritten this sentence several times. So, since the CDC can’t use naughty words like “science-based” or “diversity,” here’s a helpful list of synonyms:

Transgender

• Trans
• Transgénero (en español. Pero, el presidente probablemente prohibirá el español, también).
• Trans-Pacific Pipeline

Evidence-Based

• Based on evidence
• Empirically-supported
• Real news

Science-Based

• Based on science
• Supported by the results of a process involving observation, hypothesis formation, experimentation, data analysis, replication and peer review.
• $c!3nc3-B@$3d

Diversity

• Variety
• Diversification
• Oh, you know, that thing they’re trying to demonstrate in college brochures, where they take a lot of pictures of black people even if they invite a racist politician to speak at commencement.

Vulnerable

• Defenseless
• Susceptible
• Liable, as in “The president could be liable for damages relating to his fraudulent university.“

Entitlement

• Right
• Prerogative
• Social Security, Medicare and Medicaid programs, which will be Paul Ryan’s next targetafter the tax bill scam.

Fetus

• Foetus (rhymes with POTUS)
• Prenatal human
• The only living organisms whose rights aren’t susceptible to a variety of GOP attacks, unless they turn out to be trans.