He’s Sex on a Stick and Sings Like a Dream

Blaine plays with fire, Rachel/Finn play with their fires of desire, and everyone talks about their v-cards (Rachel, Kurt and Blaine lose theirs by the end of the episode). This week was dynamic and hit all the right points….

What I Loved.

• Coach Beiste gets the spotlight in a new way. Her softer feminine side comes to light this episode. She cries during Blaine and Rachel’s rehearsal (“I’m such a girl,” Bieste says). We learn her first name–Shannon–and the OSU football scout has a huge crush. He has to ask Bieste out multiple times before she gets the message. She immediately thinks it’s a set-up, because she isn’t a “pretty girl” and the OSU scout is too good-looking for her. But he proves himself a true romantic and a real man: “I don’t date girls. I date women. Beautiful women, like you.” So, Bieste lands a date and a much-needed ego boost!

  

• West Lima gay bar time! I absolutely loved that the gay bar–called Scandals–was in West Lima, a nod to gay mecca West Hollywood, California. Blaine’s new friend Sebastian (total hottie crushing on Blaine) invites him and Kurt to come to Scandals. Blaine plays with fire, as I alluded to, as he goes on coffee dates with Sebastian and takes part in shameless flirting. He likes the extra attention and spontaneity, but in the end, his heart lies with Kurt and he stays devoted. Hallelujah, because I would’ve had to write an angry letter if Glee broke up Blaine + Kurt.
• Also at Scandals: Kurt’s old nemesis, bully Dave, is there! He says he feels accepted at the club, as the gay guys there call him their bear cub. It all comes around, full circle and tied with a sparkly bow: Kurt and Dave find acceptance and comfort, and can relate with one another after everything.
• Glee decides to tackle the theme of virginity/sex again, but does it right–they reference the Madonna episode, which was epic but a lame attempt at covering the theme. Rachel and Finn are just moments from the BIG moment, when she reveals she’s doing this to help her acting in West Side Story. This pisses him off and sends him running. Rachel calls an emergency meeting with the girls–Santana, Brittany, Tina and Quinn–for advice. Here, Glee does a good job of showing all options and sides to the v-card theme: waiting because it’s something you can’t get back (Quinn); waiting because the dude is bad in bed (Santana); sharing it with someone you love (Tina); and losing it to an alien (Brittany, of course). By episode’s end, Finn and Rachel overcome their fight and nestle in front of the fireplace. Kurt and Blaine make up too and cuddle. The roaring fire in Finn’s fireplace can only signify the deeds that were done.

  

What I Didn’t Love.

• The theme ended up being overemphasized. At opening night of West Side Story, Blaine freaks out and thinks the audience won’t buy his and Rachel’s passionate acting, because they’re virgins. He doesn’t know how two virgins can follow up the opening act. News flash, dear: no one can tell where your private parts have been, and it’s not about to determine your acting anyway. Moving on.
• West Side Story songs were a focus this entire season so far. I barely know the play, so this is most likely why I tired of it. But WSS is finally put to a close this episode, as opening night came and went. Hopefully, Glee can now move on to non-Broadway show tunes (though I wouldn’t complain if they sang Wicked again!).

Top Character Quotes.

• “I don’t know who this Blaine guy is but apparently he’s sex on a stick and sings like a dream.” – Sebastian
• “As for the condoms, no idea, never use them. It’s worked out for me about 99% of the time.” – Puck to Finn
• “I told her I had a gift certificate for Applebee’s and she said fancy restaurants make her nervous.” – OSU scout about Beiste

  

• Number 5 on Kurt’s Bucket List:  “Have relations on a dewy meadow with lilac with Taylor Lautner before he gets fat.”
• “I had a chigger in my thigh once. It was the size of a tic-tac.” Beiste
• “Speaking from experience, Finn is terrible in bed. It was like being smothered by a sweaty out of breath sack of potatoes that somebody soaked with body spray.” – Santana
• “I lost my virginity at cheerleading camp. He just climbed into my tent. Alien invasion.” – Brittany
• “Sure beats the last time you were drunk and made out with Rachel.” – Kurt to Blaine

Next Week. Things continue to heat up: The preview highlights insults, rumors, playing dirty, intense dodge ball, and Puck confessing his love to Shelby.